I was speaking with someone today who said well, we have no choice. The situation at hand is that something we believe we desire comes with some rather rigid requirements that are being imposed to get that which is desired. Many might say that those constraints, the hoops that are placed in front of us, are unreasonable and unnecessary. Some may say that those hoops are simply a sample of what acquiring the object of desire might end up costing long-term in the event that it is acquired. Others may say that they are merely a rite of passage and a way to earn what is desired.
Either way, there is choice in the matter. But only if we are aware and dispassionate enough to step outside and look at the options. We could proceed, full speed ahead, believing we have no choice but to play the game as defined. We could refuse to be lemmings to someone else’s agenda and walk away. We could choose what we will believe about the object of desire and assign a worthiness scale to it to help determine our path. We also could look at the ramifications of each path. Ideally we look at it from a neutral third party view and play out each scenario to its logical conclusion and then make an informed and unemotional decision and commit to that decision and the resulting beliefs that support that decision.
Wow is that heady. Fortunately, it is how I think now. Okay, we are going to proceed with something that I can see going badly, but I can decide and commit to do it anyway to honor the wishes of the team and because of the learning experience for me and the others involved. Because I can be and am dispassionate about the object of desire, I will be grateful no matter how it goes. I will be thankful to have my theory disproven for I will definitely learn from that, or to have it hold and have it be a teaching moment for all.
One other possibility and the one that I choose is to walk in eyes wide open. To guard against my preconceived notions as much as possible lest they taint the outcome in some way. To believe for the best. And to stay true to myself, my team and our long-term goals throughout. I will promote and encourage a collaborative effort now and going forward and engage the individuals involved. I am not available to be swept up in someone else’s process that is contrary to my own self-respect and life agenda. However, I am available for continued learning and teaching how to have excellent outcomes in a non-adversarial, respectful and loving way. That is the lovingMEway.
